you are not your insecurities

ok so, let’s talk about insecurities. we all have them. only the most well adjusted people have them in check and let’s be honest, most of us are not well adjusted.

what are some of the most common insecurities?

well, for those in a relationship, many feel insecure about the fidelity of their mates. why is that? sometimes the lover doesn’t even exhibit signs that they’re a cheater yet their partner still believes it is a possibility. is it the lover’s fault? does the lover then have to prove their fidelity over and over again to appease the partner and their insecurities? in my opinion, no. the lover does not need to prove themselves as faithful if they’ve never given cause for their mate to believe they wouldn’t be. it is the mate’s onus to relinquish their insecurities to the wind and trust fully in their lover. unless there is reason to believe they’d stray, and I’m talking concrete proof, actual evidence, there is nothing to do except give up on the insecurity. the insecurity will ruin the relationship and push the lover away. no one wants to be not trusted and trust should be the foundation of every romantic relationship. without it, there can be no love or security.

what are some others?

for many of us, it’s comparing ourselves to others. social networking and reality tv has really done a number on the collective unconsciousness of the masses. we used to “keep up with the joneses,” now we “keep up with the kardashians” and every other person we encounter within the World Wide Web. we are consumed by profiles on sites, followers and Facebook friends. we see their lives in pictures and status updates and assume that we know them, that we know their lives and that their lives are better than ours. we become dissatisfied within ourselves, aspire to impress upon others this image of a life totally together, totally happy and complete, when that couldn’t be further from the truth. this comparing, this measuring up, has chipped away at our armors. we are left weakened and vulnerable and insecure.

there’s more.

we feel insecure about our age, our appearance, our bank accounts, our jobs, our educations. we feel insecure about our homes, our cars, our clothes. we feel insecure when we are alone, we feel insecure when we are together. we feel insecure about our weight and our health, our color, our race. this list could go on forever and ever but there is one thing true about all of them and I’m about to tell you what that is.


insecurities are not real. you are! you are so real in fact, that if you focus on that instead of your insecurities, you’d know how easily it is to vanquish them. you could go about writing them all on a sheet of paper and instantly, before finishing writing whatever the insecurity is, you’d know how to kill it.

you are a spark! a glittering ember that was once a star! you are part of the vastness of the universe. you, your essence, underwent many changes over billions of years, to become the consciousness that you are today. you are aware, of yourself, of others, of the world around you and within you. you are infinite and eternal. you are magnificent.

when you take in the totality of your existence, when you contemplate how you evolved from cosmic goop into the beautiful, ornate, intelligent creature that you are today, right now, at this moment, what do you have to feel insecure about?? who do you need to keep up with?

look deep within yourself and recognize the enormousness of your being. you are larger than life and life is pretty large. insecurities suck the enjoyment out of living. shed that old skin and step on through to the other side. you are worthy of a life completely free of insecurities but you must want it badly enough to drop the baggage. simply open your hand and let it go.

insecurities rob from you the joie de vivre. they make you small, and vulnerable. fortunately, in many occasions, greatness is born from vulnerability. so if you find yourself at this moment, in a place that is vulnerable, battered down by your own insecurities, I beg you, I ask that you, please, stand up! shake them off. feel them slide down from your head, down your body, to the ground, as if you were covered in an anointing oil blessed by the universe to take away your perceived blemishes. step forward from where you stand and know that your insecurities are there behind you, laying on the floor. trust that the universe will demolish them and send them flying off into space, never to consume another being again. now that you are clean, free and clear of your insecurities, bask in the glory that is liberation.

you are an amazing wonder!

you are spectacular!

you are stardust!


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