it’s not easy to stay conscious in an unconscious world. at times it seems like there is always something or someone trying to bring you down. what is a person to do when someone is trying to bring you down to their level? it’s seems that when you’re on a path that is positive, negative forces are constantly trying to bring you down.
I’m not a religious person but my mom is. she would always say that when you seek god that the devil will come into your life to try to block you. even though I’m not religious, I feel there is some truth to this, on an energy or consciousness level.
you see, I met someone who I really liked. their energy was positive and it attracted me. their laugh was infectious and they seemed to be soaring high in regards to consciousness, and so I identified with this person because I felt a level of kinship with them. they were like me, or appeared to be, so I liked them. shoot, our bloodlines even come from the same Caribbean island, me being Dominican and them being Haitian. I even told this person on several occasions that they were my favorite person in my office and how just hearing their laugh would make me laugh and I didn’t even need to know what they were laughing about.
(I like everyone regardless of the energy they emit. I know each of us is our own micro universe and some are stormy and others are not. that’s cool to me and I treat everyone the same.)
in the last few weeks their behavior has changed. they ignore me or only speak to me in two words or a glance. I know why they’re doing this but I don’t understand it. they’ve taken offense to me or something I said or did and I know exactly what it was. I have not apologized because I don’t feel like I have to. if you stand by your actions, you live unapologetically. if people take offense to you, that’s their problem, not yours. if people speak ill of you, again, that’s their problem, not yours. it means they have hang ups and that is their problem, again, not yours. I know exactly what caused the shift in their energy towards me but I don’t own their energy and I won’t apologize for their choice.
let me explain a little further. yesterday I posted “Why are you offended?” in that post I describe what getting offended implies. it means that the ego is in control of the offended person. conscious people don’t get offended because they take nothing personally. things like age, sex, sexual orientation, race, creed, religion, are not things that offend the conscious individual. we know these things as external mind or ego made constructs.
one by one:
age- this doesn’t matter to the conscious individual because age implies time and conscious people are not time obsessed people. age is also external. our bodies age but our souls do not. our life experiences grow with time but our souls are the same today as they were when we were born. age is simply something we humans use as a tool because for some things it matters, like the age in which we should get screened for certain cancers or the age we enter school. otherwise, all age is is a counter. it tells you how many times a body has traveled around the sun. it is the reason I don’t wish people a happy birthday. I instead congratulate them for successfully making it around the sun. it seems more fitting than happy birthday.
sex- this also doesn’t matter. this, like age, only refers to your body. your body has a sex, male or female but your soul doesn’t have genitalia. it is neither male or female. sure, they say this world is run by men but men came from women so this is all relative.
sexual orientation- another factor that is of absolutely no consequence to a conscious individual. these are labels we create to separate ourselves from others. personally I don’t believe in this. I have dated both genders and gender benders. does this make me gay? by straight standards yes. by “gay” standards no. for one group I’m not straight enough and for the other I’m not gay enough. in any event, a person’s sexual orientation is of no importance to a conscious individual because who a person sleeps with or what gender they identify with doesn’t determine a persons consciousness or the depth of their soul.
race- like with age and sex, race is unimportant to the conscious person. we see it for what it is. determined simply by genetics and the location on this planet that your blood line comes from. a soul has no race. a soul is a soul. it doesn’t have skin so skin color isn’t important. a soul doesn’t have a language or a nationality. people who are unconscious put a lot of importance on things like race but focusing on race is just separatism.
creed- same here as with age sex and race.
religion- this is simply just a line drawn in the proverbial sand. what is religion? the belief that there is a higher power, heaven and hell, or perhaps neither depending on the beliefs of that faith. what is it? the way you pray, the food you eat? tradition, something handed down from generation to generation? in my opinion, religion is like sexual orientation. it is a label that comes with rules and those who adhere to one religious label over another will adhere to the rules that apply to that particular label. it is just a form of separatism.
so a few weeks back, it was on the news that a young man went to Barney’s department store in Manhattan to purchase a belt. everything in that store is super expensive and he had saved up his money to buy this particular belt because his favorite rapper wore the same belt. he goes to the store, buys the belt using his debit card and wound up getting arrested. the store clerk had racially profiled him and assumed that there was no way he could afford the belt unless he had stolen the card he was charging it to. after his arrest and ensuing investigation, it was learned that he had indeed purchased the belt legally using his own money and was released with no charges. this young man is suing the department store now. the following day, it happened again at the same store only this time the shopper was a young woman and she was purchasing an expensive purse. like the young man, she had saved up her money for the purse she wanted only to find herself in handcuffs due to the legitimate purchase. both of these people happen to be black, African American, or whatever PC term you choose to use.
these two situations were the talk of my office. we joked about it, questioned why these two people would care to make such flagrant purchases. we wondered where their priorities were. didn’t they have more important things to spend their money on? we joked that we should all go to the store and make a purchase. we joked that none of us could afford anything in that store and we’d have to pool our money. this group of “jokers” were all shades, and by that I mean we were “white,” “black,” “Hispanic,” and even “Chinese!” we were laughing and joking and I suggested to one of the girls that we go together. one other girl said that she and her boyfriend were going to go together and that we should tag along. there was a lot of laughing and joking going on, all of us saying the silliest things and even pretending we were in the store. we put on our deepest best ghetto girl accents. said words like “aks” instead of “ask” and even pretended to complain about the prices. I mean, we were all being completely ridiculous and it was all fun and games. everything is all fun and games until someone gets offended. the funny thing is, the one person who became offended is the person I least expected it from. and mind you, she only took offense to me and my jokes which were of the same level of idiocy as the girl who said she’d be going with her boyfriend. the only difference between what was said was the skin color of who said it. I’m Hispanic and my skin color is not black. the girl with the boyfriend is Jamaican and she is black and the girl who became offended is Haitian so she too is black.
shortly after this laugh fest ended, I happened to over hear the Haitian girl and another lady talking. “that’s racist” one said to the other. when they saw me they quickly changed the subject. I wasn’t born yesterday. I also am very sensitive to energy fields. I felt an oppressive energy and I saw the way they looked at me and I knew it was me they were talking about. this was over two weeks ago and the Haitian girl who I would never expected that from has been silent and distant towards me. this is someone I spoke to everyday for months. I’m not stupid. I know why she’s upset with me but I’m NOT going to apologize. I will not apologize for a double standard I didn’t create.
so check it, what this boils down to is this:
“I’m black, so I can make black jokes. you’re not black, so you can’t and if you do, you’re racist.”
can anyone explain the logic behind this?
doesn’t this imply that the person making this statement is in fact the racist? think about it for a second. if you, make a statement like this, aren’t you implying that a persons skin color determines what they can and can’t say? also, if you make a statement like this, aren’t you drawing a line in the sand and separating yourself from others on the superficial basis of race? isn’t that racism? please! explain this to me because I seem to have missed that day in school where racism was defined. as far as I know, racism is when people separate themselves from other people based on skin color or national origin.
example: the KKK hates anyone who isn’t white. that’s racism.
so wouldn’t it be considered racism as well to delineate what a person can and can’t say based on the color of their skin? and if so, wouldn’t that mean that the person or persons crying out “that’s racist” are racist themselves? what am I missing?
by ignoring me as a result of this “offense” this individual has proven to me who the real racist is. by ignoring me they have proven how ignorant they are themselves. by taking offense to this they have shown me how unconscious they are because if they were conscious, this would not have offended them.
I refuse to apologize. I will not apologize for this because I am not guilty of doing something that everyone else hadn’t done. her behavior changed towards me and me alone. none of the “black” girls that took part in the joking have been treated differently, only I have. the real racist in this the one crying out “racism!”
I know myself and I am not racist. I treat everyone exactly the same, regardless of race, and I don’t appreciate racism in the slightest. I will not apologize for this because I am not racist. to apologize would mean I am taking responsibility for something I am not. moreover, I am not in control of anyone else’s feelings, only my own. I can not take responsibility over how she feels. that is her problem, not mine.
so how do I deal with this? that’s my question now. how do I deal with someone who has shown themselves to be unconscious from a conscious stand point?
in Eckhart Tolle’s book, A New Earth, I read that when you encounter a situation like this, you should not react. you should accept it for what it is and not react. that’s fine in theory but in application, there is difficulty. I understand that reacting would be allowing my ego to act. if I react as she has, I am making myself the same as her and I am not that way. if I take offense to her actions, I’ve lowered my consciousness and have allowed ego to take control of my emotions. how do I deal with this from a conscious level? this is my dilemma.
I’ve put a lot of thought into this. in a way, I am pleased with her reaction because it has shown me who she really is. how do I deal with her when she decides she’s over it?
I don’t want to respond from my ego. I want to respond from a place of consciousness. if she expects an apology from me, she won’t get one because I do not feel apologetic and I won’t apologize for something I am not responsible for. I will not apologize for her egoic reaction, something for which I have no control.
so last night I decided what it is I would say to her when she decides she’s over it.
I plan on saying the following: