Response to the Liebster. Thanks Don Charisma!

I’m always surprised when ppl read my blog, comment or like it. I don’t really promote my blog so I always wonder how they find me. well, a blogger who goes by Don Charisma awarded me with a “Leibster” which entails that I should answer the following questions about myself and my blog. so in gratitude for reading, I’m going to answer the questions. I’m supposed to award the blogs I read with the same thing so they can follow suit. that’s gonna be tough. I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t been reading any other blogs. I’ll send this to the ones I used to read back when I started this thing and had more time. so here goes:

first, here’s a link to Don’s Liebster: http://doncharisma.org/2013/10/30/awards-day-clairelitakeover-liebster-award-thankyou/

1) What would you do if you could do anything and you knew you couldn’t fail?

this is a tough question simply because we tend to shy away from failure. there are a ton of things we don’t even attempt due to fear of failure. that said, these things are often not thought of until presented with a question such as this one. one thing I’ve done but haven’t done in a long while is perform poetry. I used to be an avid poet, one who never missed an opportunity to get behind the mic. during and after college, I put the pen down and haven’t really done much of that at all. in fact, I’ve only done it once or twice since then. if I could, I’d like to get back into it and perhaps join a National Poetry Convention Slam Team. even if we didn’t win, I’d still love to do that. I wouldn’t consider not winning failure. I would consider never trying failing.

2) Three reasons why WordPress.com is better than Facebook?

I hate Facebook. hate is a strong word. I dislike it strongly. I haven’t used it in years. WordPress and my instagram account are the only social networking sites I use. I like to call myself the “antisocial social networker” because I don’t promote my online activities. I mostly do them for myself and my own pleasure. if someone likes what I do, I’m grateful.

3) Who is (or was) the most influential person in your life?

as strange as this may sound, the most influential person in my life is my daughter. she’s only three but she means the world to me and is my driving force. I strive to be someone she will look up to and be proud of so it is of the utmost importance that I continue to work towards self improvement and enlightenment so that I may lead her by example and show her that no matter what adversity enters your life, there is always a reason to smile and be grateful.

4) What’s your favourite thing to post about on your blog?

positivity. my life was a seething ball of negativity for many years. I came to this realization a while back and have worked towards changing that. I feel I’ve accomplished it for the most part. I do a lot of reading so when I read something that inspires me, I try to share that inspiration with the aim of pointing others in that same positive direction.

5) How do you best handle heated/angry situations?

I used to get really upset and fight back but recently I learned that the driving force behind that type of a reaction is the self preservation of ego. I don’t want to be an ego driven person so now I handle these types of situations differently. I step back, I take in the entire picture, I breath deeply and address it from a place of presence. I don’t fan the flames by arguing or getting heated. I stay calm, and open minded. many people get up at arms over the littlest things. this adds undue stress and anguish to our lives. there’s no need to add more of that to our already tumultuous yet beautiful lives. it’s best to remind yourself in these moments that these are simply moments and all moments pass. allow it to pass without resistance and you’ll move into the next moment of life without adding more emotional or psychological baggage to your spirit.

6) What is the most inspiring thing you’ve ever read, heard, or seen, and how has it helped you on your life’s journey?

well, most recently I came across two books by Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now and A New Earth, that have really influenced my thinking. it’s where I learned about ego driven lives in simplest terms and realized that I had been living my life in that way and have made a conscious effort to change that. so far so good.

7) What do you think are the three qualities to building and maintaining good friendships/relationships?

I’ve had a lot of failure in this department of my life. failing often teaches, as it should, what not to do in these types of situations as well as others. one of the things I often did was place the people I love up on pedestals. sadly, they would come tumbling down from there for one reason or another, perhaps they prove themselves to not be as great as I considered them-whatever. when this would happen, I would feel intense pain and loss and anger even. I’ve learned not to do this anymore. never place expectations on others. when you do that, they often fail but when you don’t, they may just rise above any expectation you may have otherwise created. also, I realize now that most people live in a mad world of their own creation and don’t even know it. this will make people behave in all kinds of ways that could really rub you the wrong way. knowing this, not only about them but about myself, allows me to be more accepting of what we will call people’s “flaws.” that doesn’t mean I’m a doormat, it just means I’m less likely to hold anything against someone because I understand that their inner demon, their ego, is at the helm of their lives. as Jesus said up on the cross, “Forgive them, for they know not what they do.” forgiveness implies acceptance and acceptance is liberating. so #1, expect nothing; #2, forgive people and #3, accept people. these three things for me will garner beautiful honest and caring relationships.

8) How did you pick your blog’s name?

it’s my name. it’s what my friends and family call me.

9) What is your favourite book/author, or film(movie)/director, or play/play-write, or song/band, or symphony/composer and why?

I’m an avid reader so it’s hard to choose a favorite book/author so I’ll give you two: One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez and The Chronicles of Narnia by CS Lewis. my favorite play is The Merchant of Venice by Shakespeare. my favorite song is Na Na Nothing by my favorite musician Mike Doughty. why? well, in regards to the books, both of these authors were amazing story tellers. they were both capable of immersing you in whatever world they were spinning. both no longer write. one, Lewis, has passed on and the former, Marquez, sadly, has succumb to Alzheimer’s and doesn’t remember having written any of his books or even having won the Nobel Prize for the book mentioned above. it’s sad really but his beautiful mind lives on in his books. in regards to the play, I mean come on, it’s Shakespeare. more than that, The Merchant of Venice tells an amazing story. I have always been partial to Shylock. I felt he got a raw deal. he was a product of his environment, one that mistreated him greatly and turned him into who he was. he acted out as he felt was appropriate due to how he was treated. he made a deal and was swindled out if it and his money by made up rules that went in favor of his tormentors. I disliked Porsha for doing what she did. he deserved to get what he bargained for in my humble opinion. and the song. last year I was going through a lot of turmoil. too much to go into right here however, this song, Na Na Nothing, became my anthem. it helped me to stick firm in my resolve, it kept me from stutter stepping, from going backwards in my life. it affirmed to me that I was making the right decisions and to ride the course out to the end. it helped me to feel victorious even before my battle had come close to ending and when it did and I was, it became my victory song.

10) What’s your favourite recipe you make?

I don’t have a favorite recipe but I enjoy cooking very much so I’m always trying new recipes. if I had to narrow it down, I thoroughly enjoy my baked Mac-n-Cheese recipe and I also have a stew I make with a broth made with Guinness that will make you slap your mama, that’s how good it is. I haven’t made it in a while and writing this here makes me want to. looks like I’ll be hitting up the grocery store for ingredients later.

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